I just realized that I've left all of my pictures from my Australia trip on a hard drive tucked away with the rest of my worldly possessions back in London. As a blog is nothing without pictures, I'm going to skip ahead to my time in Africa and post about Oz when I get back home.

I also didn't take any notes during my time there (travel was a secondary aim) so writing about it now would lack the nuance and embellishment that gives a good story its appeal. Time would be better served focusing on writing about where I am now for future posts.

However here's something I sent around to a few people while driving down Australia's east coast.

April 27, 2014

Been traveling the Aussie East Coast for the past 10 days of which 3 have been at sea so havent had much internet access. Will be sure to keep in better touch when I'm not paying for data.

Flew into Cairns and rented a Hyundai i20 (manual) that has served me really well so far and is great on fuel. My only gripe is that it struggles big time when trying to pass those maddeningly slow moving lorries that one gets trapped behind. As all the inter-city roads in Queensland are single lane, with only small stretches designated for passing, you get very familiar with the vehicle in front of you with plenty of time to critique their driving technique and maybe cast an aspersion or two on their character/ancestry/sex. Next time better spring for that Ferrari.

Am about halfway through my East Coast tour and am spending the night in a Mackay motel that looks like it, at the very best, may have a bed bug infestation and at the very worst, may harbor a "that's-not-a-knife-this-is-a-knife" psychopath. But it's cheap and is only for a night so no complaints.

Have a bright and early start tomorrow on my way to Harveys Bay (before spending a night or two on Fraser Island). It's a 9h+ drive so just wanted to let people know where I am and where I'm off to before undertaking such a long distance drive. Not to worry though, I'll be sure to observe the Aussie Government's oft-posted advice of "Stop. Revive. Survive." Plenty of pit stops, cautious driving and a couple of cups of Joe should see me arrive just fine. Will send around an email when I arrive in any event.

Who knew there was more to Australia than its national ambassador?

A few final observations before I attempt to catch a few hours kip:

-Sunblock is an absolute must. The sun doesn't fuck around over here. It peers through that big gaping hole in the ozone and says "F U". First day out in Whitehaven Beach and I almost burnt to a cinder... in a full wetsuit! Aussie's liberally apply the stuff like Italians apply cologne. I have wisely adopted the practice (sunblock not cologne).

-Australia is goddamn expensive. Having earned British Pounds has helped some but not much. It's probably more expensive than London and certainly more expensive than most places in North America. My fist clenches around my wallet and has a hard time relaxing whenever I go out. Like a botched attempt at picking up a girl ("I'm going to need a beer to put out these flames") or that time you decided to grow your hair out long (am still going strong btw!) it's best not to think about it and keep on keeping on.

-Australia is Big with a capital B. I had to extend my car rental because my timeline for driving from Cairns to Brisbane was too ambitious. Looking at a map of Australia can fool you into thinking that the laws of the time/space continuum do not apply to you or that you're suddenly possessed of driving skills of Mario Andretti. They do, and no you haven't. If you're travelling Australia, especially by car, allow for extra time.

That's all for now.

My friend AY, who had travelled Australia on her own a few years back added a few observations of her own:

-The insects don't fuck around either. The mosquitos are vicious. Unless you are wearing 100% deet on you when going north through the rainforest, you WILL be massacred. I would be covered with over 20 bites after having stepped out for only 5 minutes. The biting flies I came across in the Outback and in the south swarm at you in the hundreds attempting to tunnel their way through any orifice they can possibly fit in. Not to mention spiders the size of kittens. In fact, I'm convinced the whole country is just trying to kill you.

-The flora and fauna are unreal. Giant urban bats living in downtown Sydney? A 6-foot tall prehistoric bird that looks like a cross between a peacock and an ostrich? A strangler fig tree that killed its host and continues to thrive as a delicately woven hollowed out tree trunk? Only in Oz.

'Straya...

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